Features!

I think I need to spice this blog up a little.  Oh, sure, who doesn't get tired of reading about the mostly ordinary adventures of Andy and Alex and their crabby but happy mommy?  I have a pretty good thing going as it is, I know.  But maybe there's more that I can contribute to the blog-o-sphere.

Perhaps I can add some weekly features to the old blog.  Ideas so far:

Eating In Places Where You're Not Allowed To Eat.  Sometimes businesses don't want you to bring in snacks.  I'm looking at you, library and assorted play cafes.  But these kids have to eat, and Mommy's not paying a premium for crackers.  Travel along with us as I show you the best way to sneak cheese into places and where to find workable nooks and crannies for slyly snacking.

Other Children I Don't Like.  Is it so wrong to actively despise a two year old?  I didn't think so.  Every Wednesday, I will choose a brat that I just can't stand and defame him or her until my fingers hurt from typing so hard.

Crock Pot Recipe Failures.  Every family type blog needs a recipe section.  Mine will chronicle all of the well-meaning but downright disgusting slops and mucks that have emerged from the depths of my crock-pot.  I will include reviews from my children.  Alex threw up twice, I might add.  Andy declared it lucky (which is how it sounds when he says yucky). Andy has been in a lot of lucky gas station restrooms.  Some of them have been super lucky!

Why are there forty hot dogs in this crock pot?

Items That Alex Has Put On His Head.  This will be a photo only post of Alex tottering around the world inside a selection of hand-chosen buckets, boxes, baskets, bowls, and anything else that starts with the letter B and can be stuck onto his head.  This feature's subtitle will be called, "Damn, It's Dark In Here!"

Oops, I Craft My Pants.  Little kids love doing crafts- and the messier the better!  On Fridays of each week, I can do a write-up of the crafts that I have engaged Andy in each week, most of which include dollar store finger paint, some construction paper, way too much glue, and a decent amount of parental regret.

Google-Searches From A Paranoid Mom.  Who amongst you doesn't want to see my Google search history?!?  That's what I thought.  These are the things I've looked up in the past week alone:  One Year Old Under-Bite- Will They Have To Break His Jaw?;  Corn Starch Diaper Rash Myth;  Three Year Old Slurs LMNOP During Alphabet Song, Is That Normal?;  Brain Development If Toddlers Miss Naps;  Yellow Number 5 In My Foods;  Yellow Number 6 In My Foods;  What To Do If Toddler Hates Organic Mac and Cheese But REALLY Loves the Yellow Number 5 Version;  How Much Yellow Number 5 Can My Baby Safely Ingest?;  Odds of One Year Old Getting Brain Damaged From Three Year Old Hitting Him In Skull With Toy Mack Truck Repeatedly.

What other weekly features would you like to see on this blog?