The (Other) Talk!

Andy, Alex's Protector

Every couple weeks or so, I have The Talk with Andy.  Not THE Talk, unless you count the "No, Andy, you don't have boobies" talk as part of THE Talk, but the OTHER talk.  The Stranger Danger Talk.  Andy is pretty squared away on what do if someone approaches him and says, "Your Mommy says it's okay if you come with me" or "I have an adorable puppy holding six lollipops in that creepy looking van over there, want to come take a look?"  Just say no.  Run for Mommy.  Use vulgar language if you'd like.

We were having our talk, and I continued on with the questions.  "What if a stranger picks up Alex and tries to take him?"  I asked.  "Then what should you do?"

Andy answered swiftly.  "I would scream at him and kick his legs and step on his feet until he put Alex down."

"That's a pretty good idea.  But then what if he picked up YOU?"

Andy shook his head and replied with the utmost of certainty.  "Mommy, he wouldn't pick up ME.  I'm the one who kicked him!"

And this may have been my proudest moment.  Perfect reasoning on the part of a still three year old.  Why would the stranger want to kidnap the little shithead who kicked him?  He wouldn't.  Problem solved, major kidnapping diverted.